There’s a storm rolling in for some.
Reservations for Breakfast. Big Brunches. Big plans.
The Hallmark holidays meant to be meaningful and connecting can be for some, like a storm on the horizon, blowing in closer like a massive wave until it hits the heart. There may not be a table dressed in white linens with fine food to enjoy with 10 other people, pancakes presented, a present to unwrap or phone call to place with, “Happy Fathers Day” greetings.
There may be screaming kids under foot, laughter, a messy kitchen, barking dogs, teens with attitudes, toddlers with tempers and disorganization and chaos. There might be plans that don’t go the way one wants (or, if you’re lucky, a perfect summer’s day outing!) As moms and families that are real and flawed, sometimes that’s just the way these days go, right moms? But we try, right?
Instead of an in-person visit with families, there might be Facetime, a phone call or text. Phones and screens can carry and deliver our love, thoughts and words or a mail carrier can deliver that special card from across the miles. There’s no substitute for the in-person hug, we know that, and we lament that distance when there is some, and do the best we can at making those living afar, feel loved.
For those whose time has passed, we remember them, their love and what they meant by re-telling stories, sharing memories, and using the day to reflect and honor the impact their love and presence had in our lives. The hole felt can be filled by remembering that parts of who we are today are largely due to their presence and active role in our lives.
There might be men and or relationships worthy of cherishing and people to reach out to as a man can impart the qualities of a father without the title, “Father.” I am sure there are many who are blessed by those who have come into their lives and have filled in those cracks and spaces with love, support and friendship.
So find that father, that friend, that someone who has helped, loved or supported you and/or celebrate the one in your life. Maybe it’s your own husband, father, special friend, coach, teacher, neighbor or a relative. Fathers Day does not have to be defined by fancy tables (but no harm if there is one, hope it’s at the Four Seasons!) but remembering with love who we have lost, and appreciating those we have and how we can make their day and hearts, a bit sunnier and brighter.
Sometimes simplicity of the day is all that is needed and some good old fashioned appreciation.
Even over a simple glass (or plastic cup) of orange juice.